Famous Inventors

I decided to make an attempt though. I chose a golden disc, enscribed with the number 10. I chose 10 because it is currently 10:10am as I am writing this. Oh hang on, it’s just turned 10:11 but that’s not important. The disc has a map of Europe on one side, this is because I sense that your past life involved Europe. I flipped the disc and it showed ‘heads’. Based on this, I believe that your past life is as follows.

You were born to a noble family around the time of the Napoleonic wars. Although noble, your family was in financial trouble due to the excessive drinking and gambling of your brothers. The family seat was in Sussex, although they also had land in Wales. You were probably the mistress of Lord Wellington or something. When your brothers died in a freak horse explosion, you inherited the family holdings and struggled to get out of debt. Having no other choice, you joined the professional fiddling league. Since nobles were not expected to play the fiddle, you always wore a mask when competing.

After much fiddling in obscurity, you got your big-break and won the Fiddle Playing Cup. The prize money allowed you to pay of most of the family debts. A year later, a jealous rival filled your basement with squirrels.

That is just a rough reading though, some of the facts may be innacurate. I suspect that it’s just as reliable as anything Sylvia could give you but considerably cheaper than her services.

The discs are widely available from most Banks but I would caution you against using them. Unleashing the akashic record is very dangerous for most people. It’s safe for me because I attended an intensive 2 hour training course that allowed me to grow an extra strand of DNA – this protects me from harm.

On her web site, Sylvia says “The Holy Spirit works through Sylvia to emanate God’s love, grace, and blessings.” Shortly after this, she points out that it’s going to cost $750 if you want her to pass on God’s love, grace and blessings.

Obviously it makes little sense to try to profit from such a gift. I’m fairly sure that if God wants to bestow such powers upon someone, he probably doesn’t intend for them to turn it in to a business. Imagine “God & Son. Leper healing, salvation and wine for a reasonable price”.

This is why I issue a challenge to Sylvia.

I will use my Predictor Disc to answer questions about the future. Please feel free to post them here in a yes/no format. If I were to charge for my gift, surely I would be a money hungry vampire, willing to stuff my pockets with the money of the desperate and lost. I would be a total shit and I would feed on human misery, uncertainty. I would be taking the emotional damage caused by the loss of a loved one and turning it in to a dagger to twist in the heart of my victim while emptying their pockets.

This is why I am offering my gift for free. I promise that I will answer your questions with around a 50% success rate.

Syvlia, will you join me in helping the people of this world?